My Boyfriend Sucks

Sweet Sweet Privacy!

2009-08-03T05:54:00.001-07:00

Last night I did laundry and went to wash the (4 days worth of) dishes. I have a bad habit of talking to myself, and spent most of the dishwashing time telling my boyfriend everything I couldn't say to his face. I thought I was doing this pretty well under my breath, but he must've heard me; because when I was done and went to sit on the couch, there was Captain Sensitive with tears in his eyes, laptop packed up, saying that he was going to head back to his mom's the next day.

I sighed. Great, just what I want at 10:30 Sunday night, in the middle of fucking laundry - a weepy, emotional man wanting to be reassured that I care about him, and I'm not breaking up with him, yadda yadda.

I took the opportunity to explain to him that, while I wasn't comparing him to past boyfriends, this relationship seemed to recreate an apparent pattern I have with men: date a while, they quit/lose their job, and move in with me, and I become a primary breadwinner and caregiver. I told him it felt like this was happening again with us. I understand he can't find a job, the economy sucks. But I also finally revealed to him how pissed I was that he quit his job in the first place.

Of course, I had to stop there, because he was getting too emo about being in my house for a month with no job, and watching me begin to seeth with irritation over his continued, unproductive presence and my lack of privacy. I had to get him out of that depressed mood because frankly I cannot deal with fucking emo people. (I'm an optimistic, energetic person as a rule, and people like that just suck the life out of me.)

So, the bottom line is he is going back to his mom's until he gets an actual solid job lead, and I no longer have to pretend he's not driving me bonkers. I'm glad I was able to unburden my thoughts, but I wish he would nut up a little, and not act like everything is so sad inducing. Oh well. He is what he is. At least I can poop with the door open again.

"It's me. I know."

2009-07-16T09:15:00.000-07:00

"I have been dating Kevin off and on 3 years I guess. Hit me day 2 we were together but I loved him and i stayed.

Now we have a daugter and I really cant leave. I be alone my whole life nobody will be with a teen mother, nobody want somebody elses baby. He breaks up and goes has sex with some girls and then he come back to me cuz he love me. And hit me if i tell him he cant come back

I just wanted to share cuz you girl think your man is all shit but at least he don't hit you.

~ cassie ~"

You're right, Cassie. He doesn't hit me. I got involved in my teen years with a man who did, however. The first time he hit me was the last. I suppose we all have our different levels of what we will put up with.

Really? REALLY?

2009-07-14T11:26:00.001-07:00

I must be retarded.

I knew this would eventually happen. Given my brilliant track record of choosing men, it was inevitable that this one would eventually quit his job and move in with me. Why not! That's what they ALL do after a while.

The kicker is, what kind of mongoloid quits a decent job in this economy? You 'couldn't stand it anymore'? You know what I can't stand? Being the SOLE BREADWINNER for myself and apparently the grown man I've now fucking adopted.

You know, if I wanted to raise a fucking kid, I would HAVE ONE. I am tired of dating a guy for a year or so and then having them bumrush into my house with all their shit and announce they are unemployed and crashing with me now.

Hey asshole, I can't afford to support us both, and frankly I don't want you living with me. But the fact is, after 2 years together I'm an asshole if I don't let you move in. After 2 years, it's time. People start asking you where you're going with it, when is he moving in, are you guys getting married? It's the whole shit or get off the pot routine, and I don't appreciate it.

And men know it, too. They know all they have to do is get a year or two under the belt and they can quit the jobs, move outta mom's house and into yours, and sit around watching movies and dicking around on craigslist all night, sleeping all day, and you will not do shit. You won't, because you have two years with the guy, it's expected that you guys move in together. You won't, because after two years you feel obligated to the guy, responsible for him. You won't do anything because two years is a lot of time to invest.

You won't do anything except get progressively more resentful that you are now feeding, cleaning up after, sheltering an overgrown teenager on an endless summer break who, after you make his dinner, clean up his fucking messes, do his laundry, and give him his allowance, wants to have sex with you.

Fuck you. Get a fucking job!

2009-01-19T10:29:00.001-08:00

I'll be honest - I completely forgot about this blog.

I moved out shortly after that last post, and haven't regretted it a bit. I just wanted to update all of you who are STILL writing in this blog - you CAN do it, girls.

I have a new boyfriend now, and the 'sucks' part will probably be pretty boring. I am going to start up again though, because honestly, there is always time to find something annoying about a man. Not that it takes much effort.

In the meantime if any of you have questions or want advice send me a message or comment, and I will be happy to respond.

Hey, success.

2006-08-31T19:11:00.000-07:00

Congratulations, boyfriend. I am now apathetic. Nothing's left. I'm done caring what you do, I'm done trying to talk to you about anything. Have a great birthday with the people you love more than me.

I'm sure you'll meet Miss Right in San Fran.

And to top his birthday cake...

2006-08-31T18:01:00.001-07:00

I now see on his blog that he is inviting all his little e-pals in SF to come to his party. Me? Nope. Could I feel more wanted?

God, how much more of this shit can I take????

2006-08-31T14:28:00.000-07:00

So the boyfriend's 21st birthday is tomorrow. For months, I've been asking him what he wants, does he want to go to dinner, something. As late as today he turned me down, saying he doesn't want to drink and doesn't want to celebrate his birthday.

Then an hour later, it's my friend bought me a plane ticket to San Francisco and they are throwing me a party!

So...basically he doesn't want to do anything with ME on his birthday, is what this boils down to. Great. Whatever. I'm going to go out with my girlfriends and get roughly drunk and he can go fuck himself and his stupid e-pals and whatever whore of the night they dredge up for him to make out with on his birthday.

Oh to be selectively deaf and dumb.

2006-08-28T12:59:00.000-07:00

Look, I understand his friends are more important than I am. He's made that pretty clear by 1. always taking their side even when they hurt me on purpose just for fun, 2. spending all free time online chatting to them, rather than I don't know, having dinner with me, 3. spending any money to take weekend trips to visit these goonfucks instead of I don't know taking me out of town for a weekend.

You know I can hear you all sitting there going "Well if she is this bitchy no wonder he doesn't want to spend time with her." People you don't get it. I was MADE this way by him constantly choosing (insert anything) over me, putting me down and making me feel stupid or annoying, like I'm just a fly buzzing in his ear interrupting his irc conversations. I was made this way by being ignored, like those kids that get no socialization and turn feral, barking at anyone who comes near them. I'm going through the stages now...right now I am at the banshee stage. He wouldn't listen to me when I tried to just tell him what bothered me so now I've moved on to screaming and crying to make him hear me.

(ASIDE: By the way, ladies, men always say this shit...'well how can I change if you don't tell me what is bothering you?' Well, you then try to tell them and they inform you you are being stupid or dramatic and your feelings are invalid because whatever is bothering you isn't a big deal [basically because if it ain't a big deal to a man, then it just ain't a big deal, sugartits]. Bottom line: Men don't really want to hear anything that comes out of your mouth unless it's about them or their interests, and men don't care if you're happy, so if you aren't happy with him how he is, move on. He won't listen, and he'll never change.)

Soon enough, and I'm finding it already, I'll be moving into completel emotional withdrawl. Apparently he hasn't noticed the physical withdrawl has already started a lot, except that of course when HE wants to sit with me or sex then I better be on call and supply. If not...I get "What's wrong?" WHAT'S WRONG??? Has he not listened to me for the LAST 3 MONTHS?

More proof that with men, if it doesn't matter to them, then well it just doesn't matter at all.

So, a little history...

2006-08-28T11:32:00.000-07:00

I've been living with my boyfriend for 6 months. Everything of course was fine for about two weeks until the internet called him again. It was right back to staying up all night, not just on his keyboard but suddenly there is going for walks at night, binge eating all night, showering randomly at 3am, and basically sleeping when I'm awake and waking up the minute I'm asleep to get online and go for walks.

Now I'm pretty convinced he is either cheating on me, or thinking about it. This kind of behavior is just too typical of the last ones I've seen cheat on me (especially when it's an online affair). He swears he isn't and I don't have any proof (because frankly I'm too lazy to dig for any) so I just randomly assume he is and drop it.

So...basically this is where it stands for the last oh, 5 months. I never see him, we rarely speak - unless it is for him to tell me to not talk to people online or to inform me that anything I know or have heard/read is wrong. I know he still lives with me because I hear him showering and leaving to go 'walk around' at 3am, and I clean up the Tunguska level event devastation the next morning while he mumbles 'mornin have a good day work k bye'. I just don't know if he lives with me emotionally anymore. I'm starting to wonder if he ever has.

So let us begin this bitch picnic from here.

Welcome

2006-08-28T11:17:00.000-07:00

Since my boyfriend doesn't want to hear my complaints, and my girlfriends don't need to hear them, I'm going to log it here from now on, in the hopes that one day, after I am fed up enough, he might read this and glean a bit of insight into all the things he has done that have created the emotionally shut up girlfriend with the sewn shut vagina. Maybe my suggestions will come in handy when he finds his perfect girlfriend. Or serve as a warning for her. Whichever.

Enjoy the trainwreck.